Black & White or Gray

On The Good Wife this week, the law firm that the show revolves around spent the episode debating about whether or not to take a civil case of a woman who was a masseuse who wanted to sue a very famous humanitarian for sexual assault.  I won’t go into details about the case because, if you haven’t seen it (and you should), I don’t want to spoil it for you.

What I found interesting about the episode is all the back room wrangling that was taking place.  If they took the case and lost, how would the public view that? If they won, how would that be viewed?  Is this a true case or something the opposition sent to them to try to discredit them? How would this impact the race for Attorney General since one of the lawyer’s husband was running for that office? If they were so in favor of protecting women, how would it look if they turn down a case of a woman who was assaulted because they didn’t want to look bad?

With all these questions swirling around and how the victim was being questioned and doubted and vilified, it made me think about how gray everything is in life.  Issues are not black and white.  Yes, there are rights and there are wrongs.  It is wrong to force yourself on another person sexually. It is wrong to assault people. It is wrong no matter who you are, either famous or not. There is no doubt that it is wrong.

But, if you are famous, the chance that you will get away with it is huge.  After all, who wants to be known as the person who accused someone who is loved and cherished by the world of the horrible crime of sexual assault? There would be the inevitable accusations that the victim is just in it for the money or the publicity. There will be the jokes about “I wouldn’t mind if that person assaulted me! Ha, ha”. There will be the teams of people working for that famous person who would spin it that it was just a misunderstanding or a shake down or whatever else they could come up with to protect the reputation of their client. It is easy to take an issue that should be black and white and blur it into grayness so that no one knows what really happened but the criminal will emerge from the scandal with his reputation intact.

Along the same lines, and for a personal tie in, years ago, I was working at a residential life office at a university in New York and some girls were standing around discussing a class they had just taken where the subject had been sexual harassment.  They were all strongly stating that, no matter what, they would never tolerate sexual harassment on the job and they would stand up for their rights.  I started laughing and asked them if they had ever held a job.  All of them said no (it is a pretty wealthy school and the majority of the kids came from pretty well off backgrounds).  I then said they had no idea what they were talking about.  They became indignant and asked what I meant.  I said that when you are living paycheck to paycheck and you need your job, you learn to keep your mouth shut. If your boss or someone else higher up in authority says something inappropriate or makes lude comments, you learn to not say anything and just put up with it. After all, it will be your word against theirs and you do not want to develop the reputation of someone who accuses their boss or other co-workers of sexual harassment.  So you keep your mouth shut, do your job and maybe, if you are lucky, report the incidents when you quit your job and have an exit interview with the Human Resource Dept.  Even then, that won’t do any good because, years later, you find out the person who made lude comments has been promoted and is now the Vice President of the company.

Yes, some things are black and white.  But things can also be made gray and blurry and the truth hidden and buried in order to protect people who are considered more valuable than the lowly person doing the accusation. That’s just the way it is in this day and age.  Actually in any day and age.  We may live in a country where all people are created equal but that is just an ideal and not the reality.  Sad, I know, but true.

If you missed The Good Wife this week, or any other week, try to catch the show either in re-runs or on DVD.  It is really well done and thought provoking.  Well worth your time.